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Every relationship has ups and downs, but what makes a long term relationship work is the way couples in a relationship navigate challenges and stay connected. Gottman Method to Couples Therapy was created by Dr. John Gottman and Julie Gottman and is an evidence based approach that helps couples to build a healthier relationship providing them with practical tools to improve their communication, learn healthier ways to work through conflicts.
Unlike traditional couples therapy, the Gottman Method is built on 40 years of extensive scientific research involving thousands of couples, to identify what actually works in successful relationships.
This approach supports partners in:
According to the Gottman’s Method, for every difficult moment, there should be at least five moments of appreciation, connection, or joy. On the flip side, relationships in distress often experience behaviors that predict relationship strain, what he calls the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, which are:
Attacking your partner instead of addressing concerns with kindness.
Shifting blame or making excuses instead of taking responsibility.
Expressing disrespect through sarcasm, name-calling, or eye-rolling.
Shutting down or withdrawing from conversations instead of working through challenges together.
The good news? The Gottman Method helps replace these habits with healthier ways of relating to each other.
At Therapy Villa, we customize Gottman Method Couples Therapy to align with your unique relationship dynamics. The process typically involves:
We begin with a thorough evaluation of your relationship using the Gottman Relationship Checkup, a research-based assessment tool that highlights strengths and areas for improvement.
Using the Sound Relationship House model we guide you through practical strategies to enhance your partnership:
Each session is dedicated to boosting connection, diminishing destructive patterns, and promoting emotional attunement to ensure long-term success in your relationship.
In our sessions, we’ll explore your relationship dynamics, identify patterns that may be causing stress, and introduce practical tools to help you communicate more effectively. You’ll also get exercises to practice between sessions, making it easier to apply what you learn in real life.
This approach is helpful if you and your partner want to:
Not at all. The focus isn’t on replaying every argument but on understanding the patterns that keep showing up. Together, we work on building healthier ways of communicating and resolving conflict so those patterns don’t continue.
That’s common. Many partners feel more comfortable once they understand the sessions are about building connection, not blaming or pointing fingers.
Yes. The Gottman Method can be very helpful for couples at a crossroads. For some, it offers a pathway to repair and rebuild; for others, it helps clarify decisions and fosters respect and understanding, even if separation becomes the healthiest option.
There’s no set number; it depends on your relationship’s needs and goals. Some couples find a few sessions make a meaningful difference, while others benefit from longer-term support to create lasting change.
At Therapy Villa Psychological Services, we understand that seeking couples therapy is a significant step. Our couples therapists are here to answer your questions about how Gottman Method Couples Therapy can strengthen your relationship, improve communication, and help you and your partner reconnect.
Curious if this approach is right for you? Call us at (416) 883-3001 or email us at info@therapyvilla.com to schedule a free 20-minute consultation. Let’s explore how this approach can help you and your partner create the relationship you desire.
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